xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' The Font of Noelage: 2020

Tuesday 17 November 2020

Losers, Sore Losers and Dummy Spitting Donald Trump.

 

We all know people who do not like losing.                                                                                           Let’s face it, nobody likes losing. However, some accept losing more gracefully than others.       Throughout history some losers have become infamous for their bitterness in defeat.                                The 2020 US Presidential election looks like establishing Donald Trump one of the greatest sore losers of all time. Bigly!                                                                                                                                         

 In Mid November, two weeks after the election day, Joe Biden is more than five million votes ahead of Trump. More importantly, he is well ahead in the Electoral College vote, where 270 is the critical number for victory. Biden already has 306 votes and counting. This is the same number of Electoral College votes that Donald Trump won with in 2016, when he quickly declared that he had thrashed Democrat candidate, Hillary Clinton. He used words like Huge, Awesome and Bigly to describe the scope of his “massive” victory. In 2020 he is saying, without producing any evidence, that  the election was rigged, that he “was cheated” and that he is the real winner.

Adolf Hitler was so cheesed off that his brutal 1000 Year Third Reich only lasted for 11 years, before the Russians stormed into Berlin, that he blew his brains out. However, killing yourself because of a loss is quite extreme. We can all remember the spoiled boy in our cricket playing childhood who threatened to take his bat and ball home if he was given out. Such sore losers act like petulant babies and are generally known as Dummy Spitters. Donald Trump is at present giving an Olympic Gold Medal performance in Dummy Spitting. He is also doing great harm to his country in the process.

Tennis player, John McEnroe, typified the sore loser, though he did not lose too often. Cranky Mac would berate umpires, ball boys or even his own racquet if an umpiring call went against him.

Another tennis great, Serena Williams, was so unused to losing that she went into vitriolic meltdown when beaten in the US Lady’s Championship by a teen aged girl named Naomi Osaka. Who can forget Williams, enraged and fuming, shouting at the umpire “I’m a mother,” as if that was reason enough for her to never, ever lose. Williams outburst was so brutal that the respected tennis referee she verbally abused took an early retirement. Naomi Ozaka just stood quietly by, weeping.

Of course not all losers are sore losers. The Washington Generals is a US basketball team. They started playing the Harlem Globetrotters in 1953. In 1971 they had graciously suffered 2495 straight losses to the Globetrotters before they won their first game, 100 to 99. I am unable to find out how the Globetrotters took this rare defeat the well practised losers. I assume they just shuffled of the court, smiling and whistling their theme song, “Sweet Georgia Brown.”

A gentleman named Norman Thomas ran for President of the USA as an independent in every presidential election from 1928 to 1948. He lost each time by very big margins. He always warmly congratulated the successful candidates, Herbert Hoover, Franklin Delano Roosevelt (four times) and Harry Truman.

Bob Newhart is a popular comedian who starred in TV’s Bob Newhart Show from 1982 to 1990. The show was very popular and Newhart was nominated 25 times for an Emmy Award for his performances. Each year he attended the Emmy Awards with a winner’s speech in his pocket but, despite his 25 nominations, he never, ever won the coveted statuette. Of course, Bob Newhart was a gracious loser, at least in his public persona, and made jokes about the lack of Emmys on his mantelpiece.

Yes, everyone likes a gracious loser. In the 1950s, the best amateur male tennis player in the world was Australia’s Frank Sedgman. He won major tennis tournaments, including Grand Slam finals, all around the world. He also won Grand Slam doubles championships with his friend, Ken McGregor and helped Australia to several stirring victories over fierce rivals, the USA,lry for possession of the hotly contested Davis Cup.

One day, in a major tournament in Australia, Sedgman was defeated. He was interviewed after his shock defeat by an ABC radio commentator, who remarked that Sedgman was smiling even though he had lost. I was a young boy when I heard this radio interview.

“Why are you smiling? asked the radio man. “You just lost.”

Sedgman replied, “When I  starting  playing competition tennis, my mother told me that if I won I should look as if I’d just lost and if I lost I should look as if I’d won. It's not always easy, but that's what I try to do.”

At the time, Sedgman was coached by legendary, Harry Hopman, who instilled Sedgman’s winning/losing philosophy into the other Australian players of that era, Hoad, Rosewall, Newcombe, Emmerson, Cooper, Stolle, Hartwig, Laver and others. They all won humbly and they accepted their losses graciously. Handshakes and smiles all around.

In later life, Hopman moved to America and coached the emerging volatile star, John McEnroe. Unfortunately, McEnroe mother obviously did not dispense the same advice to her son as that that given to Frank Sedgman. McEnroe’s highly successful career, under Harry Hopman, was marred by many controversial harangues.

Some find it strange that Harry Hopman, who insisted on absolute sporting decorum on the court and a strict observance of tennis etiquette by his Australian players, was prepared to let McEnroe run rampart, trampling on tennis etiquette whenever he played.

The answer is probably money! In Australia, Hopman was employed by the Australian tennis authorities to coach our national team. In America he established his own very profitable tennis coaching business and he was dependent on McEnroe’s international tennis success for his own financial benefit.

Donald Trump is certain to lose the 2020 Presidential election. His constant criticism of the voting system and his refusal, as the first defeated president not to follow long established conventions regarding the peaceful transition to a new president, has thrown the US into turmoil. Armed groups of civilians are clashing in many American cities. One group arguing that Trump has been robbed and the other group celebrating Joe Biden’s victory. The country is in crisis. Donald Trump seems quite happy to let the situation bubble and boil away. He is doing nothing to aid Biden’s transition to the presidency, which could even threaten national security.

Another sore losing dummy spitter in American political life was famed businessman, Henry Ford, the man who put Americans into motor cars. In 1918, Ford decided to stand for the US Senate. He was nominated by President Grover Cleveland as the Democratic candidate. However, Ford was not content with that. He wanted to be the Republican candidate as well and put his name up at the Republican Convention.

The New York Times wrote quaintly of Ford’s inexperience for the senate candidacy, “Mr Ford is a successful businessman, but he has demonstrated convincingly on many occasions, not only his lack of acquaintance with basic international and national affairs, but a certain quality of mind which forbids the hope that he will ever be able to overcome-that lack of equipment-an altogether impressionable mind for public affairs.”

To Ford’s great surprise, the Republican’s nominated a rich, well educated and successful businessman, Truman H. Newberry. To Ford’s even greater surprise Newberry won the Senate seat for the state of Michigan. Ford immediately claimed that he had been cheated. For the next four years, Ford claimed the election was rigged and constantly petitioned for a recount.(Sounds familiar.) He said he was the victim of a Wall Street bankers in a “Jewish conspiracy.”

Not only that, Ford hired teams of lawyers and private investigators to dig up dirt on Truman H. Newberry and relentlessly pursued him. He made Newberry’s life a misery. Ford took the case to the Supreme Court and, after four years, he succeeded in having a the Senate recount  the 1918 vote. Newberry won the recount. However, he decided to resign as he was tired of Ford’s unprincipled attacks.Ford did not seek to run for office ever again.

A similar thing happened in 1932 when Franklin Delano Roosevelt easily defeated Hoover. In those days the new president was not inaugurated until March 4. Roosevelt was voted in on a New Deal to provide government support to the starving, the poor and the vast army of  unemployed. He also wanted to initiate government building projects to stimulate the economy and get people working again. Hoover saw this a a Bolshevik plot and staunchly opposed it. In stalling the New Deal Hoover prolonged the misery of the depression. Trump, in stalling the transition to Biden will continue to ignore covid-19 and thousands of Americans will suffer and die as a result. America needs to work out a federal election system that installs the newly elected president one week after the polls close. Most democratic countries manage to do this already.

In obstructing a smooth transition, Trumpis aided, of course, by the horse and buggy electoral procedures put in place by the US Constitution. The Constitution actually ignores the popular vote in favour of an Electoral College. Each state is allocated members of the Electoral College based on population. Members are appointed according to which party gains the most votes in each state.  

Two states appoint college members from the two major parties on a proportional basis. The other 48 states give all of their electoral college votes to whichever party gets the most votes, even if it is just a small majority. In 2000, George Bush had a majority of about 500 votes over Al Gore in  Florida. That was enough to give him all of Florida’s electoral college votes… and the presidency.

Trump is aided in his truculence by the fact that the US Constitution says that the Electoral College does not meet to elect the president until the first Monday after the second Wednesday in December. Six weeks after the election. Unbelievable as it may seem, the US Constitution and state laws do not require the Electoral College members to vote for the party that won their state’s majority. They can vote for whichever candidate they please.

Indeed, there have been many Electoral College members who  have voted against the candidate who won their state’s presidential vote. They are called Faithess Electors. Makes you wonder just how democratic America is?

Whatever way the electoral college votes, the new president is not actually inaugurated into the position of President until January 20 of the following year. That is another six weeks after the Electoral College votes. Plenty of time for Trump to stir up even more trouble.

No doubt, in future years, dummy spitting sore losers will be looked at scornfully and said to be “Doing a Trump!”

God bless America!

Tuesday 22 September 2020

Getting out and about in the time of Covid-19.

Even in the midst of the Covid-19 lockdown, starting in early March, I was able to enjoy pleasant walks around the neighbourhood. These days I usually only walk a kilometre or two, but it keeps me in touch with the blue sky, the flowers, birds and the occasional dog.

However, sometime in May, I found that after walking about 200 metres, I got a pain in my lower right calf. It was not an excruciating pain but it did make me hobble along like an old man. Even though I am 82 years old I do not like to hobble along like an old man.

If I stopped walking for a couple of minutes, I was able to walk pain free for another 200 metres or so. I concluded that poor circulation was the cause of my problem. My GP confirmed this when he applied various tests and pronounced that I was suffering from Claudication. He sent me off to have an ultra sound on my right calf.

I made an appointment at a nearby medical imaging centre. I was sitting, quietly relaxed, in the reception area when a young brunette called my name and asked me to follow her, which I did. We chatted pleasantly as she led me down a long corridor, before pausing in front of the door leading to her work area. She opened the door and invited me in to a rather dark room that had two quite large TV monitors in it alongside a hospital bed.

“ Take your trousers off,” said the young lady as she closed the door just after I had entered the room.

“OK,” I said to her, “but I do not even know your name.”

“It’s Sam. Now lie down on the bed.” So I lay down on the bed in my underpants and a shirt. She started unbuttoning my shirt.

 “ Er, uh..,ah… It is my right calf that is the problem, “ I said as the young lady undid the last button, pulled my shirt open and started pushing the top of my underpants waaaay down low.

“Correct,’ she replied with a slight laugh, “but your calf problem could be caused by a blood supply blockage in your abdomen. So, I will give you an ultrasound of your abdomen and your right leg.” She was very good at her job. Eventually told me that I had a 90% blocked artery behind my right knee.

Two weeks later I was in Day Surgery being prepped for the insertion  of a stent in the blocked artery behind my right knee. I was having a knee by-pass. After I had put on my ill-fitting hospital gown an attractive young, blue eyed, blonde,  Irish nurse helped me fill in some forms.  She explained that I would need to have my groin shaved and asked me to follow her. I knew the drill as I had had my groin shaved  by nurses a couple of times before when I had surgery for a hernia operation in 1998 and in preparation for and angiogram after a heart attack in 1993.

However, I was surprised when she led me into a Gents Toilet where she placed a towel on the floor. Then, like Mandrake, she produced a verydainty, feminine looking electric razor and proceeded to demonstrate on the outside of her hospital issue slacks how and where I should shave my own groin.

Shave my own groin! This is not how I remembered it. After her brisk and business like demonstration, the nurse left to me to attack myself with the electric razor. Naturally, I took extreme care and found the task more difficult that I would have imagined. With a pile of pubic hair on the towel on the floor and the mirror above the wash basin reflecting a rough looking Brazilian, I made my way back to my Irish nurse. She took my word for it that the job had been done and showed no inclination to check my handiwork." What has happened to Quality Control, I thought?

Later that morning the surgeon cut into my left groin, inserted a special needle and eventually placed a stent behind my right knee. They gave me a needle to calm me down. However, I was conscious throughout the thirty to forty minute procedure and watched the whole thing on a nearby TV monitor. Afterwards, I had to lie still for four hours to ensure the entry wound into the artery in my right groin was sealed sufficiently for me to get up and go home. Around 4-30 pm the room nurse gave me the all clear and I walked away with no pain whatsoever.

A walking miracle of modern  medicine.

As the Covid-19 lockdown eased in the second half of the year some previously postponed events came back on the agenda. My wife, Lesley, and I subscribe to concerts at the Concert Hall and His Majesty’s Theatre. In August I received an e-mail from His Majesty’s Theatre informing that a concert that had been postponed was now going to be staged.

The e-mail explained that because of Covid-19 spacing requirements, only a maximum of 500 people could occupy the various seating spaces in the stalls, the dress circle and the upper dress circle. We were informed that to spread people around, our reserved seats in the stalls had been switched to seats in the upper dress circle and asked if we were  happy with that?. Well, we were more than happy and looked forward to the concert which featured stars of WA Opera.

We arrived at His Majesty’s about thirty minutes before the concert was due to start, making our way up three flights of stairs to the upper dress circle. I was surprised that the people sitting in the dress circle were not "socially distanced" at all. I expected every second row to be empty, but that was not the case. About 500 people were sitting elbow to elbow in the rows with no spaces between the rows.

I found myself sitting next to an elderly lady and her daughter. I say she was an elderly lady but she was probably  ten years younger than me. About five minutes before the concert started I felt the need to blow my nose. In the middle of a pandemic I wondered if blowing my nose in a crowded theatre would cause the same sort of panic as if someone shouted “Fire!”

I leaned towards the elderly lady and said in hushed tones, “I am going to blow my nose. I do not have a cold. I do not have coronavirus. I have an allergy. It gives me Post Nasal Drip. When that happens I need to blow my nose. I am going to blow now."

The lady put her hand on my arm and said, “Oh, my Dear, I am so glad that you said that, as I am going to blow my nose, too.” Which with both did.

Thankfully, nobody panicked.